Life Bucket List: To Crash a Wedding

Wedding CrashersThe other day my friend and I were talking about wedding crashing. I don’t know if it’s something people do in real life or just in movies but regardless, I want to do it. 

Preferably the wedding will be large and lavish, where the guests are all a bit tipsy and they won’t notice my presence. I would be Mrs. Emily Scottsfield who’s husband is away on a business trip in England and was so sorry they couldn’t make it to the wedding. I would be a distant childhood friend of the bride and hopefully they wouldn’t cross-reference that fact with the bride herself. 

I’d like to enjoy the wedding ceremony sitting at the back, crying my eyes out. Since there would be 300+ guests, I’d blend in well. I would get to the reception a bit late and take a seat at a table that had a no-show. Better yet, there would be a standing reception so I don’t need to cross that hurdle. 

I would eat, drink, dance, socialize, all with a slightly fake but yet believable accent that comes across as foreign yet undistinguishable. Obviously I would be the life of the party.

I’d flirt with the cute waiters (even though I’m “married” it’d be fun anyways). I would stay out until midnight and leave in my expensive car. 

And then, if I get caught…if…it wouldn’t even matter because my night had been one I would never forget.

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